Wherever you are in life, several major decisions have been made to get you here. Those decisions may have been good or bad, and may or may not have been made by you.
As a child, your parents made all the decisions that affected your life – your neighbourhood, school, diet, religion, clothes, extra-curricula activities and, possibly, friends. These choices would have shaped, not just your early life, but the person you have become. In addition to all of this, their attitudes would have rubbed off on you too, affecting your inclination towards prosperity, conflict resolution and empathy, amongst others.
Later on, you may have weighed in on the choice of your university or career path, depending on how liberal your parents were. Until, finally, you began to make your own decisions – taking a job, starting a business, buying a house or car, dating and marriage. Now you’re in the realm of joint decisions – children, a different house or car, travel and finances. So far, so good.
However, what happens when you want to change your life? What do you do, when you realise that you are nowhere close to where you expected to be at this stage? Maybe you haven’t quite scaled the heights in your career, made millions of dollars in business or found the ideal life partner you’ve been dreaming of. What decisions did you make that led to this point and what can you do to change your future?
I faced this juncture recently and had to confront my disappointments. After years of life going to plan, reaching goal after goal, I had encountered a number of setbacks. If this has happened to you and your first response is to blame someone else – don’t. I knew that it was all about decisions I had made, consciously or unconsciously, that had created my results. After a lot of soul-searching over a period of several months, I made some significant decisions that will alter the trajectory of my life completely.
However, there was more. My introspection had uncovered something deeper and potentially more damaging than poor decision-making or procrastination – it revealed subconscious programming from childhood that had affected my attitude towards being wealthy. It explained why I would reach a certain level of success and somehow manage to self-sabotage, even if it was simply through inaction. Unconsciously, I had put limits on myself and the size of my dreams.
If this has happened to you, know that your family was either trying to protect you from life’s disappointments or they were not aware that their negative comments would affect your psyche. It’s up to you to take responsibility for your life and to repair the damage yourself. There are countless personal development books that can help you to reprogram your mind and move you towards unlimited prosperity.
Luckily, it’s never too late to make life-changing decisions and I’ve made a few that will move me towards dreams, previously deferred, that used to scare me. It has taken many nights of study until the wee hours and many hours of meditation to get there, but things are finally falling into place. Quite a few people around me are on similar journeys, so we support and encourage each other, cheering for each breakthrough and success.
There’s no neat conclusion to this post – it’s part of a journey that I will continue to document. If you identify with this story, please drop a few lines in the comment section below – I would love to hear from you.
“The key to accepting responsibility for your life is to accept the fact that your choices, every one of them, are leading you inexorably to either success or failure, however you define those terms.” —Neal Boortz
“Your life changes the moment you make a new, congruent, and committed decision.” —Tony Robbins
“Sometimes it’s the smallest decisions that can change your life forever.” —Keri Russell